What if my biological children don't want me to adopt?

We are looking to adopt a child but our biological children don't want us to adopt.


  • edited October 3
    Your reaction to this will depend a lot on the age of your biological child as well as the age of the child you are adopting. Many young children simply do not understand adoption. Many may object to the idea of any additional child out of jealousy or fear. If you have a younger child, I would suggest talking to them about what their fears or concerns are. Take them on a special outing to talk through adoption. If their fear is that they will feel left out, continue to reassure them. I would also suggest including them in the adoption process as well as counseling. 

    For older children, it will be much of the same, however, you will likely be able to have a more in depth conversation about their concerns. Some children may also have jealousy and fear. Some may have bought into many adoption myths portrayed by the media. Some children may really think it is a bad idea for your family to adopt. 

    In both of these cases, it is important that your children feel heard. Their opinion on the matter does not mean that you should not adopt, however, they may have a point that you have not thought through or may be struggling enough that you feel it is best to wait. If the concerns are minimal or myth based, reassurance and involvement in the process may be all that is needed. 
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