Whether you’re an adoptee, a birth parent, or an adoptive parent, there is pain in open adoption. Sometimes open adoption is painted as all rainbows and butterflies, but adoption stems from loss from all sides. If you’re not sure what pain in open adoption this article is referring to, you can take this quiz to help understand who is feeling pain and why in an open adoption. Read up before you take the quiz to better prepare yourself!
Although open adoption is in many ways a blessing, when the pain that comes with it is never addressed, then the pain will only increase for those involved.
For adoptees, there is pain in losing their first family. Although it might help a child’s life to be better, it does not mean the adoption will come without pain for an adoptee.
A birth parent makes the ultimate sacrifice by placing a child in another’s arms. Open adoption can help by removing the mystery of where his or her child is and if the child is safe. A birth parent in an open adoption will get updates on the child or even visits. But an open adoption does not eliminate the pain.
Adoptive parents may have been through the pain of infertility or loss, but adoptive parents also must watch their child and their child’s birth parents go through incredible pain. Sometimes there is nothing adoptive parents can do to help the people they love. That is a real and true pain in open adoption.
Open adoption has the potential to be the greatest option for all in the adoption triad, but it will not come easily or without pain. It will be like any other important relationship in one’s life: difficult, rewarding, heartbreaking, and beautiful.
You can take the quiz here.