“As foster parents, we are asked to not only care for the basic needs of a child, but also sit alongside them as they digest the hurt and damage they have undeservedly experienced.”
A piece of advice I hear all the time for new foster/adoptive and international adoptive parents is this:
Don’t take their behaviors personally.
And this is why. These kids have experienced trauma and loss beyond what many adults will experience in their lifetimes. And they have experienced it with immature brains and limited life experience. Sometimes what they need is a safe place, a rock, a reliable person that they know will stay firm through all of their struggles as they learn to process their experiences and move toward healing.